99 Cent Whore-oscope: Gemini!

Here’s an excerpt from the 99 Cent Whore-oscope.  To find out what she said for Gemini this month, click on the link on my bottom (Oops! I meant to type “THE” bottom.)  

Then I looked all over the damn store for some WD-40.) Speakin’ of WD-40, iddn’t that stuff great??!! Any product that claims to “lubricate, clean, protect, and penetrate” is aces in my book.  Sometimes if I’m REALLY in a fix I’ll pray to it.  I’ll just say:

“WWWD-40D?” (What Would WD-40 Do?)

I swear it has gotten me out of many a tight spot and close calls! Try it! It works almost as good as prayin’ to St. Anthony (he’s the paintin’ saint of lost things- like if you can’t find your wallet or your KY or your “Tuesday” day-of-the-week undies? You’re just sposed to close your eyes, turn around 3 times, and say “Anthony, Anthony, look around. Something’s lost and can’t be found!”  Anyway… where was I, Gemini? Oh yeah! So I was slidin my slide-screen winduh to the left to tell my whoracle-oracle powers of premonition to pipe down about you! But before they hushed-up, they said this: http://wp.me/p1SDxB-1B